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Thursday, November 18, 2010

Okay, I Have a Gripe

Per my divorce decree where child support is concerned my ex is to notify myself and the district clerk’s office certified mail of any change in residence and/or employment within 7 days of the change.  He’s been at a new job for about three months now.  Do you think he’s reported the change?  You’re right!  He hasn’t.  He failed to notify me via certified mail but did text me that he changed jobs and that I should start receiving money soon.  He’s done this twice over the course of three months but it’s funny how still no payments have been received by the attorney general’s office.  I see, somehow I was elected to be the only responsible parent.

Make no mistake; this is not a situation where I rely on child support to make my ends meet.  I am self sufficient in being a single parent raising our child.   I love my daughter and could not imagine emulating any of his actions. I do not depend on his money to raise her even though it IS his responsibility just as it is mine.  Just to cite a couple of examples, he’s supposed to pay for half of any medical bills, he does not.  I pay them.  He’s supposed to reimburse me for costs of monthly medical/dental health insurance.  He does not.  I pay for it.  I reiterate, I am the responsible parent.

He is the epitome of “deadbeat dad” which can be described thanks to Wikipedia as “a parent that has freely chosen not to be a financially supportive parent in their children’s lives, a mother or a father that willingly fail to pay child support ordered by a family law court ….”

So, he began a new job, failed to make the proper notifications blah blah blah. I have been fortunate enough to learn where he works etc.  Yay me.  I call the district clerk’s office to see about updating the information and I can BUT I have to send a letter with the information, okay.  Cite the cause number, okay.  And also include a $15 check (Wth?!) with my driver’s license number and date of birth on it. Plus if I want a receipt, include a self addressed stamped envelope.  The fee is for a new employer’s order to withhold.  Once again, the responsibility is on me.

I find it extremely aggravating because 1) he’s not paying child support as he should (only paid a few months within the last year) and 2) somehow I’m penalized a fee and have to go through the process of doing what he is supposed to do to even be able to attempt to get any support money from him at all.  I feel like I’m getting doubly screwed.

I am easily angered and frustrated with him and his lack of responsibility to his own child.  It plain just pisses me off.  It’s like regardless of a court order, he somehow is above the law.  No repercussions.  No consequences.  If I were not supporting my daughter, ensuring a roof over her head and groceries in the pantry, clothes on her back etc ... I’d be quickly described as a neglectful mother.   

I guess I must’ve missed the No Responsibilities When You’re a Parent workshop somewhere along the way.

Monday, October 25, 2010

Reality Check

Usually when I least expect it, life has a way of giving me a reality check.  *sigh*

One of these days I'll learn ....

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Dummy Me

I went to leave for work this morning and my car wouldn't start.  Dummy me forgot to turn off the headlights last night which drained the battery.  Luckily my daughter was home so I could get a boost.  Dummy  me again, killed the car and went back inside, came back out to a battery I hadn't charged long enough.  Nothing like being in a dress and heels, popping the hoods of two vehicles, connecting the cables and starting a car first thing in the morning, TWICE.

But on a good note, it's going to be 70 degrees today, yay!

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Divorced, Finally!

One ginormous thank you to one judge whose signature on one particular legal document categorizes me once again in the NON-married persons of society.  Non as in not as in no longer as in dee-v-o-r-c-e-d, gosh I loooove how that reads!  =)